Jenny. 24. Chicago. Blackhawks. 19-10-88-81-2-7-50. Reading. Music. Lee MacDougall. Sam Bradley. Marcus Foster. Trying to bring Sofar Sounds to Chi-town. Winter is coming ; )
Not even a year living away from home and I’m going to have to move back home because I can’t afford it. I have no money for anything anymore. My eye is red and swollen and I can’t even afford to go to the eye doctor. I have $70 in my account til I get paid Friday and even when I get paid, that goes to paying my mom back for covering the $200 worth of work my car just needed.
I’m upset with myself because I thought I was doing so well. I thought that starting my new job would get me so much more money, and it didn’t. Well, a little bit but not as much as I need. Between rent and student loans and car insurance and utilities and mother fucking GAS, I have about $100/month for food. No kind of life-living there :/
I’m going to be 24 in August and I will be moving back in with my mom. My mom has no problem with it, she offered it to me and said I could live there for a few months while I saved money to figure out my next steps. My sister, who I live with now, well… she’s a whole different story. She makes twice as much as I do but will not help me out— and I don’t expect her too. I don’t want to feel like I owe her for anything. But what bothers me is that her boyfriend is over here 75% of the time, he should just fucking move in, and then we could split the rent 3 ways. I could pull that… but it won’t happen. My sister is too proud and stubborn and she would never, EVER ask her boyfriend to pay for his time here.
So, I’m upset. To everyone who knows me, I will now be the girl who cannot afford to be an adult yet, who had a taste of freedom and now has to move back in with her mother because she’s broke.
I AM grateful I have options, grateful that I have a place to stay and people who care about me and want to help me out.
Just can’t shake this depressing feeling of failure.
That’s all. TL;DR. Sorry.